Lunch With Arf
by The Shiny Sword
Summary: One-shot. Zafira isn't afraid of anything... so why's he cowering on the floor? Humor. ZafiraxArf


Disclaimer: I don't own MGLN if I did it would be MBLZ

I was writing something entirely different at first when a song on my ipod gave me all sorts of ideas. Thus the following is inspired by the song "Lunch with Gina". It's also a slight slight AU where Zafira never fought or even saw Arf in adult human form.

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**Lunch With Arf**

Zafira was not afraid of anything. He was a wolf after all, a brave, strong and powerful animal. The fiercest of the fierce, able to pierce through the strongest of shields with a mere glare. Due to this anyone would undeniably be confused by his position on the floor of the Yagami home while doing his best imitation of a corpse.

The house's blinds were drawn. The lights were switched off along with any device that could make the slightest noise. The entire home was silent, from the outside it would appear completely devoid of life. The only thing off about the scenario (other than Zafira and his stone impression) was the-

DING DONG! DING DONG! DING! DONG!

-constant scream of the doorbell.

'No one's home no one's home' Zafira repeated the mantra in his head, praying to every higher power he'd ever heard of that the person on the other side of the door would get the hint as his back was beginning to ache. There was a pause in the bombardment, Zafira allowed himself the hope that they'd given u-

DING DONG!

No such luck.

The bell ringer would have to leave eventually. No one could stay there forever... unless... Terror griped Zafira when he realized what would happen if the ringer stayed until Hayate or one of the others came home... undeniably they would unwittingly invite the ringer in and Zafira would be discovered.

DING DONG! DING DONG!

Zafira could only hope Arf would give up before that happened.

"Wait wait so lemme get this straight," Vice wiped a tear from his eye. The pilot was barely able to contain his amusement. "You're being stalked by Arf? That little kid who-" he let a snicker out- "hangs around with Yuuno?"

Zafira glared down into his coffee and nodded. He'd called Griffith and Vice into the little coffee shop (aptly named The Little Coffee Shoppe) for two reasons. One, he needed their advice and opinions on the matter (though he could have lived without Vice's laughter) and two, Arf had been banned from the premises for an... earlier incident.

"Well she's just a child I don't see what harm she can do," Griffith sipped his tea, he claimed coffee was too strong, and flipped the page of his newspaper. "Actually," he looked up from his paper with a small smile, "it's kind of adorable really."

Zafira sighed, "It's not." Arf seemed to think of nothing more than having a date with him. Every single day she called him, visited him, or followed him around to ask him out.

"You should be flattered," Vice grinned and leaned his chair back onto two legs, "you loli killer you." Vice apparently found his own joke hilarious as he cracked up and came dangerously close to toppling over in his chair.

"Well it is true that you seem to... draw young girls," Griffith took off his, now foggy with steam, glasses and wiped them off. "After all Vivio decided she's going to marry you when she grows up yesterday right?" His smile started to grow into an all out grin, "Perhaps she'll-" He let loose a giggle, "-be Arf's rival." Griffith lost it and started laughing right along with Vice.

Zafira did not think it was humorous in the least. He thought it was annoying and terrifying. It wasn't that he was afraid Arf would do anything dangerous but rather that he had no idea how to deal with her in the least. How did one tell someone they weren't interested? No one had ever taken an interest in Zafira before.

"If she wants to date you," Vice put his chair legs back on the ground with a thunk, "why don't you do it? Give 'er one date. Knowing you, you'll probably bore her to tears and make her not want to come within a foot of you."

"..." Zafira contemplated the idea. "That..."

Vice braced himself for anything that might be thrown at his head.

"That might work."

Luckily for him Zafira was too stuck on getting Arf to leave him alone to notice the insult.

"MEOW! MEOW! You have a call MEOW!" A cutesy high pitched voice emerged from Zafira's pocket.

"... Is that your cell?" Griffith raised an eyebrow.

"Pick up the phone MEOW!"

"... Vivio must have changed it... again," Zafira fished his phone out of his pocket. He paled at the information on the screen, "it's her."

"Well now's your chance ask her out!" Vice snatched the phone out of Zafira's hand, pressing the call accept button as he did. "Here you go."

"A-ah Arf." Zafira spoke into the phone. ".... mm... Would you.... like to get some lunch tomorrow?" There was a long pause, "12:00 … alright... see you..."

"That wasn't so hard now was it?" Griffith patted his friend's hand.

Zafira merely stared in his drink looking for all the world like a dead man walking.

12:10. Zafira checked his watch again. Surely Arf, who had been bugging him for a date for quite some time, was not late. The wolfman stirred his water, he'd wait until twenty past. If she didn't turn up then at least he'd have an excuse to throw at her next time she bothered him.

…

...

12:15. Where was she? Zafira wasn't one to worry but Arf acted like neither hell nor high water could keep her from him. He stared at the door waiting for her to arrive.

12:19. Zafira was going out of his mind with worry. What if something had happened. She was just a kid after all, even if she could turn into a rather frightening animal, anything could happen to her really.

Zafira had stood up, ready to go out and search for her when a red head stepped through the doors. She was familiar but Zafira just couldn't place her. She waved at him. Where had he seen her before?

"Zafira!" She happily called. Her outfit was awfully familiar though he'd never seen it as filled out in certain... chestial regions. Wait a minute if Zafira remembered correctly...

No. It couldn't be. It was true that Arf had both a fully grown form and a puppy form but it hadn't occurred to Zafira that the same could be true for her human self. But when she sat across from him with the same toothy smile it was undeniable.

"Sorry I'm late," She picked up the menu, "Did you wait long?"

Zafira could only shake his head as all words had fled his mouth.

"Oh good I was worried you'd wait for too long and blah blah blah..." Arf started talking but Zafira could no longer hear her really, his thoughts were stuck on one thing, if lunch with Arf lasted forever it would still end too soon.

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A/N: He he I invented a word :3. Poor Zaffy, Arf acts pretty obsessive in this one. But it's not really her fault, Hayate told her the best way to win a man's heart is to bug him all the time.


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